Category Archives: Random musings

Peace

I’ve recently been writing a lot on Steem and forgot to schedule my post for here!

The last couple of weeks have been insane and my soul craves peace. Maybe a weekend hike is in order.

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We’re Only Human

I think we can all accept that people make mistakes. Some of them are worse than others, there’s no doubt about that, but mistakes often result in shrugged shoulders and a comment “Hey, we’re only human.”

So then, I wonder, why do we not extend the same courtesy to units of people? This could be a married couple struggling to parent, an organization that didn’t make exactly the right statement, or friends who didn’t offer the words of comfort you were looking for. Certainly, credit should be given for trying, right?

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I’m not saying we need to throw a parade because a white supremacist says “hey, maybe people of color have value.” That would be stupid, because they should have come to that conclusion well before lighting their tiki torch and going on a rampage. A simple “I’m glad you’re trying to be better” will suffice. And then a lengthy conversation about why they felt an entire group of people didn’t have value before.

When a church realized that it’s statement that “people of any faith, or of no faith at all, should be troubled by the increase of intolerance in both words and actions we see everywhere,” was being touted by white supremacists within their midst as a statement supportive of their bigoted views (how? But whatever, I guess) and they update their statement to say “White supremacist attitudes are morally wrong and sinful, and we condemn them. Church members who promote or pursue a “white culture” or white supremacy agenda are not in harmony with the teachings of the Church.” That’s the type of statement that should have you thinking “this organization has struggled with race relations in the past. Good for them for trying to move past it, they might be worth some consideration.”

Ultimately, I think that a lot of the horror we have been seeing is due to a serious lack of respect for one another. While not every attitude deserves respect, the person holding the bigoted attitude would benefit from respectful education about why their attitude presents a problem.

 

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Do you always have to be the one to engage? No way, you need to engage in self-care and (at least for me) that often means not engaging other people. You say what you can and then you step away.

People make mistakes, that’s just part of the gig. Organizations are made up of people and even though we are better together most of the time there are also times when we fall short.

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*Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

*Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

*Photo by Pablo Orcaray on Unsplash

Lifting Weights

I recently started working out again and I am once again reminded of some of my own issues surrounding fitness. I’ve been debating unpacking them here, but my family can confirm that I am a terrible unpacker. It took me a full month to literally unpack from our recent trip to Utah. But practice makes perfect, right?

My problem with fitness is about lifting weights. It’s not that I can’t lift, it’s not even that I don’t want to do it for its own sake. I know it makes sense for women to lift weights because it increases our bone density. But with all of that, I don’t lift because I don’t want the body that comes along with weight lifting.

Note: Moving forward in this post there are going to be triggers for partner violence. Please be aware and take care of yourself.

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Way back, way way way way back in 2008 I was enrolled in a weight lifting class. It filled the physical fitness requirement for my A.A. degree and it was online so I could work out on my own time. It was perfect.

About a month after the class started, I ran into and started “hanging out with” a fellow that I had known several years previously and he gave 15-year-old Rachel the creeps. He was also inexplicably magnetic. So, as a 19-year-old (going on 20) I proceeded with caution. The self-blaming side of me knows that I should have listened to the 15-year-old version of myself and had nothing to do with him. But that kind of thinking will get you nowhere fast.

There I was, in my weight lifting class and doing great. I felt great, I was getting stronger. And there he was, tearing me down and making me feel small. Treating me terribly because, well, look at how strong I was. Of course I could take it. That body could take it.

Thanks to my amazing parents and supportive friends I made my way back out of that “relationship” before too long. One of my friends, whose help was enlisted by my dad because she was an expert in the types of people I suddenly found myself with, said after a few months “I found this organization that is having a conference to empower women. You need to be empowered. Let’s go!” It’s because of that that I had the courage to run for public office.

It’s because of that experience that I write. It’s why I wrote a novella (consequently, you can get it on Amazon if you’re so inclined).

So maybe someday that courage will find its’ way into my fitness routine. But for now, I don’t lift weights.

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Seriously Funny

I generally think of myself as a serious person. Anybody who has read this gem knows that this self-impression is 100% false. I have serious thoughts and I take important things seriously, but I really am pretty goofy at heart.

Embracing these dichotomies about myself, for my post this week I’ve added a little poem to this fabulous photo my Nine Kopfer. This is similar to the regular, everyday, little rhymes that are just a regular part of life when you have little kids.

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Wait a minute, we’re fish! Fish don’t blow dandelions!

Our Better Angels

I recently started a new job, and while there are some growing pains I’m finding it to be a generally fabulous experience. My new role has allowed me to look at some recent events in a lens that I haven’t exercised for a while.

I have been seeing so much in the news about the inflammatory behavior of Kathy Griffin, debates on NPR (which is where I get most of my news) about the place comedy has in the political landscape, and so much more. The theme I’m picking up – and I got this especially from a fabulous dialogue on NPR on my way home the other day – is that it really feels like a lot of folx out there are not appealing to their better sides. Jokes about children, the disabled, and other vulnerable populations are fair game. Behavior is designed to shock, and not in a good way. This is not a good thing, this is not okay, this is not normal.

We certainly can appeal to the best humanity has to offer. I think of the podcast I’ve started to listen to religiously – Stuff Mom Never Told You – and their recent episode on policing women’s speech (Mom, this is the one I was talking about the other day!). Bridget and Emilie talked about how women say “sorry” not just to apologize but also to express empathy. Maybe instead of apologizing about apologizing we should be saying to our male counterparts “Apologize more!” In this case, expressing empathy for our fellow human beings is a good thing.

CARING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE IS A GOOD THING!

This is a short post, so I just want to conclude by encouraging you to be the best version of yourself. Because, if you’ve been reading me for a while (if you haven’t, welcome! I’m glad you’re here) you know how strongly I subscribe to the notion that “we all do better when we all do better.”

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